Friday, January 20, 2006 

Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep little trauma patient...


Doctors are toying with ways to turn Demolition Man into a reality show.
The process includes allowing patients to 'bleed out' while replacing their blood with cold saline solution. This extreme hypothermia can hold wounded pigs in suspention for 3 to 4 hours. No word yet on weather the pigs can still be made into bacon when they wake up.
Doctors are requesting authorization to begin doing this in truama wards.

\Link/ to the news article

posted by Haseman at 7:40 AM | |

Tuesday, January 17, 2006 

Poly want a c--what?!?


Proving once again the people who live in the UK not only pronounce things wrong, but they're just as weird as their pronunciation of 'Basil' and abuse of mayonase would portend.

Chris Taylor became suspicious of his girlfriend when he heard his parrot yelling "Yes Garry" in a fairly good imitation of his girlfriends voice.

The girlfriend's take?

"I am surprised to hear he got rid of that bird," she added to The Guardian newspaper. "He spent more time talking to it than he did to me."

/Link\ to the CNN story

posted by Haseman at 6:16 PM | |

 

The Gallery of Regrettable Food

Lileks.com brings us The Gallery of Regrettable Food, a treasure trove of Dark Ages cookbooks. And by Dark Ages, I of course mean the United States from the 50's to the 70's.

As Mister Lileks describes the cover page before leading us into the Knudsen's official cookbook,

"Flattened penile midsections in the upper right-hand corner are just a hint of the dairy-based nightmares contained within."

The Knox Gelatin cookbook is also well worth a gander, though not on a full stomach. Meat! Meat! Meat! is also another chilling glimpse into why baby boomers are such moody cry-babies.

And for a special treat, try 7-Up mixed with milk! I bet you have to drink it in one shot before it curdles... Fun for the whole family!

Stop reading and go!
\Link?/

posted by Sir E. D. W. Lynch at 11:13 AM | |

Monday, January 16, 2006 


Inform is the latest attempt at giving you exactly what you want from a news source.
You know exactly what kind of news you want...right?
Good, neither does anyone else, but at least this thing will go fetch you 'stuff' based on articles that you've read and like.

If the point of reading the news is to read only about stuff you know about then...uh...well... wait a second...
Regardless of your definition of 'News' check out 'Inform.' It's fat free.

/Link\

posted by Haseman at 12:27 PM | |

 

Stick it back to the man


Turn the tables on the next blood-sucking telemarketer that latches on to your neck through the telephone.

Use this fantastic counter script from the EGBC with exelent responses such as:

Do you have a problem answering questions to a stranger on the telephone about which you don't know the purpose?
or
I can appreciate your concern, but aren't you calling me?

Remember, every moment of a telemarketer's time you abuse is another moment that someone...somewhere gets to take a bite of their dinner in peace.
The script might not make the time leeches go away, but it should be at least a little bit entertaining.

\Link/ to the EGBC website.

posted by Haseman at 7:27 AM | |

Saturday, January 14, 2006 

The latest gubernatorial freak show...


First there was 'The Body' then there was 'The Governator', now we have 'The Impaler'.

Running on a platform of running bad people through, practicing witch-craft, and just being all around creepy, Jonathon "The Impaler" Sharky has annouced that he's thrown his uh...sword? into the ring for the 2006 Governors race in Minnesota.
If you haven't read about this guy yet you must be living under a rock, but his insanity is most worthy of a post on this here blog.

/Link\ to the poor man's webpage.

posted by Haseman at 3:12 PM | |

Friday, January 13, 2006 

The Latest & Funniest from the Gutting/Slicing Industry

From the makers of various cutting, gutting, gouging, slicing, and stabbing implements comes a curious ad you can sink your teeth into.

This promo site for Gerber Knives is a delightful combination of cutting edge (ooo, punny) advertising sass and political incorrectness... Presumably this will appeal to Gerber's cutting, gutting, gouging, slicing, and stabbing customers--a market that until now didn't have a slammin' Flash website. Keep refreshing the site for new and alarming slogans... and then buy yourself something "stabby."

\link/

posted by Sir E. D. W. Lynch at 6:22 PM | |

 

Awesome! American Carmaker Poops Out Another Retro Design

In yet another example the American car industry's new fad-not coming up with any new ideas-DaimlerChrysler has pooped out a "Weren't the 70's Way Groovy?" Dodge Challenger concept car for the Detroit autoshow. Using very expensive German time traveling technology, the American designers traveled back in time to essentially copy the 1970 Dodge Challenger muscle car.

As a nod to 70's nostalgia, they have also included a 6.1 liter hemi V8, which delivers "disco inferno" sub-20 MPG gas mileage.

Should the car go into production, it will join the Dodge Charger, Chrysler 300C, Dodge Magnum, PT Cruiser & HHR clone, Ford Mustang, and the Ford GT, all products of the retro craze. All we need now is a "blast from the past" fuel crisis. Oh, wait...

In related news, somewhere in Europe or Asia, a car manufacturer innovated.

/Link\


posted by Sir E. D. W. Lynch at 5:04 PM | |

 

Does your iPod make TaterTots?









Griffin Technologly's new TuneCenter lets your iPod talk to your TV, amp, and the pope. It gives you a remote, another video out jack to deal with, and the ability to control photos and video from the television screen.
Add internet radio to the mix and now your iPod should do everything but make tater tots.

\Link/ to the product website.

posted by Haseman at 9:58 AM | |

Thursday, January 12, 2006 

FileSwap! Funky internet randomness






Spin the wheel. Upload a file, get a random file back from the 'Internets' at large.
One upload = one download.

This could get addicting...

/Link\

posted by Haseman at 9:19 PM | |

 

I do not like green eggs and......


In keeping with what seems to be our trend of the day...

Scientists in Tiwan have bred green glowing pigs.

No joke I could make at this point could be more weird or funny than that simple fact.


"The researchers say they hope the new, green pigs will mate with ordinary female pigs to create a new generation - much greater numbers of transgenic pigs for use in research."

All hail our new masters, the Green Glowing Pigs.
...I do not like them Sam I Am.

\Link/

posted by Haseman at 12:26 PM | |

 

Lose your grip on reality...Checkout TagCloud


Build your own set of realtime news Tags.

TagCloud builds a personal visual representation of language based on RSS feeds specified by you.

Think of it as a dinner menu for your RSS feeds.
It's loosely based on its predicesor known widly as Yahoo Tag Soup.

/Link\ to TagCloud's webpage

posted by Haseman at 11:27 AM | |

 

Desktop Fusion up for grabs?

Thought cold fusion was only in style for people with an affinity for tin-foil headgear? Think again.

According to Rusi Taleyarkhan of Purdue University, ultrasound is the key. Point ultrasound at water and it will break up. That break up releases heat and a little vapor. Get enough of that heat going and you can have a miniture sun in no time at all.
Why any human being with enough brains to stick under a tinfoil hat would ever want to sit next to a mini star is beyond the understanding of this writer.

However, there are probably some who would want free energy from water......

\Link/ to the article.

posted by Haseman at 7:30 AM | |

Tuesday, January 10, 2006 

Follow your nose! It always uh...well...knows?

According to the New Scientist dogs can smell cancer. My Father, a Radiologist, has claimed that he can smell it on occasion as well....(Pull any A therefore B logic on this one and I'll break both your legs)

Apparently, the dogs have a near 100% success rate with lung cancer and a near 90% success rate with breast cancer.
Snippit:
Dogs do as well as state-of-the-art screening tests at sniffing out people with lung or breast cancer. The research raises the possibility that trained dogs could detect cancers even earlier and might some day supplement or even replace mammograms and CT scans in the laboratory.

What's that Lassie?

/Link\

posted by Haseman at 6:24 PM | |

Saturday, January 07, 2006 

Realtime info goodness

An amazing example of real-time information awareness can be found in this moving London Tube map. The map is tied into the estimated travel time directory of the London subway and will stretch and move to visually denote the time it takes to get between stations.


Very interesting stuff.

\Link/ to the map. From here

posted by Haseman at 12:01 PM | |

Friday, January 06, 2006 

Teaching a new dog old tricks?


Not content with watching movies, listening to music, and being a mugging waiting to happen with your iPod?

For some unmentioned amount of money, ATO will turn your iPod into a video recorder.

Someone might stop to wonder what purpose this serves. That someone hates freedom and seeks to undermine our very way of life! Er...Yea....

\Link/ to ATO's website.

posted by Haseman at 12:44 PM | |

Thursday, January 05, 2006 

Welcome our new masters.




Just in case the American Soldier wasn't badass enough already...The defense department wants to give them battery powered X-ray vision.
The suckers cost 1000$ a pop and will detect motion through 12" of solid concrete.

Lets just hope the enemy doesn't leave a fan on....or cats....

/Link\

posted by Haseman at 6:35 PM | |

 

Fernet Branca: You Need It!


Question: What alcohol single-handedly dictates the global price of saffron while tasting like Robitussin that was left out in the sun too long?

Answer: It is Fernet Branca, a mysterious Italian Digestivo.

Like most good booze it has secret ingredients, a long and storied past, and until recently it contained opiates. Read this San Francisco Weekly article about Fernet, its horrible taste, amazing curative properties [aphrodisiac], and inexplicable popularity. Then find yourself, despite your best judgment, picking up a bottle at the local boozeria. You will hate it. Then you will love it.

\Link/

posted by Sir E. D. W. Lynch at 3:46 PM | |

 

11 Billion $ fine

You read it correctly. According to the Inquirer, an ISP out in who-the-hell-cares Iowa was awarded an 11 Billion dollar (that's billion with a B) settlement against a very prolific spammer.

One would hope this could put the breaks on other spammers.... Just like the war on drugs has stopped so many drug dealers.

/Link\ to the news post

posted by Haseman at 1:01 PM | |

 

Firefox's next Killer App

AllPeers, an up and coming free download plugin for firefox, is a drawer style Bit-Torrent client.


The app allows users to build a 'friend list' with-which to share media and software.
Various reviews are trotting it out as FireFox's next real killer ap.
They've been boing'd and slash'd several times over the past few weeks. Lets just hope they can deliver.

\Link/

posted by Haseman at 7:15 AM | |

Wednesday, January 04, 2006 

Irony is still alive


Lets hope it never fades away.

It's good to see that even animal rescue operations still understand it....

I give you the following laugh-assuring video:

Pinky the Cat: \Link/

posted by Haseman at 6:37 PM | |

 

Who's got a crazy trick?

With the advent of free video sharing, it's interesting to watch all the amazing videos that crop up from people who appear to have more free time than anyone should posess.
Wait until advertisers figure out that people will watch this kind of stuff and pretty soon you'll see these kinds of videos done by people covered in brands.

\Link/

posted by Haseman at 1:52 PM | |

 

Only 100 things....


The great BBC gives us 100 things we didn't know a year ago...





Some of the best:
11. One in 10 Europeans is allegedly conceived in an Ikea bed.
20. The Queen has never been on a computer, she told Bill Gates as she awarded him an honorary knighthood.
73. One in six children think that broccoli is a baby tree.

/Link\

posted by Haseman at 10:26 AM | |

 

The Book of Cool


It seems somewhat fitting that our first entry would point you to the "Book of Cool"
Everything from Bar Flair to Skateboarding. Check out the trailer here.

\Link/

posted by Haseman at 9:25 AM | |

 

All the hip, none of the hipster

This site is dedicated to the decemination of all things interesting and insightful. From viral advertising to politics, find it all here.

posted by Haseman at 9:17 AM | |